Back in the heady days of 2012 I wrote an end of year summary about my own personal highlights. Come January 31st a slew of ’round up articles’ can be found in the media reminding us of the year that was ~ When Brexit took over every news show, Who wore what to the Royal Wedding{s}, How we didn’t win the World Cup, Love Island’s Dani and Jack, The Beast from the East….
Once again I have decided to make it more personal and share with you all my 2018 highlights/realisations/joys. Who doesn’t want to know what I’ve been up to? Whoop! Strap yourselves in kids. Here be the Twitter style moments of the year that is/was 2018
BEST REALISATION:
{Big Sur and me on my tod}
I realised in 2018 that 90% of what I worry about is a waste of time.
I managed to spend from January until Monday 18th June worrying about driving on my own in America. More importantly I worried about spending a week with just my own company. I have always stated I can never live alone. I know that I will fall into a deep dark hole of lying on the sofa and doing absolutely nothing. I know that. It’s part of my lazy, addictive, unmotivated nature. I thought that travelling from San Francisco to LA on my own for an entire week would make me really sad and low and uninspired. I worried about it for six months.
WHAT A WASTE OF TIME! I couldn’t have been more wrong. I picked up my car {Don’t ask me which car I had. I have no idea} at San Francisco airport, spent a long time sorting out the Sat Nav, took a deep breath and headed straight into pretty fast traffic….with a massive grin on my face. I was doing it! And there was nothing to worry about. I did become incredibly familiar with a nearby neighbourhood as I tried to navigate a one way system and get myself onto Highway 1 but after that I was flying. Literally. Driving in America is so easy! I’d never driven an automatic car before, which is a piece of piss, and who knew that a Sat Nav literally holds your hand and guides you to your destination? I even survived the eight lanes of traffic in LA.
As for my own company I decided I quite like it. I CAN get through a week on my own. I worked out I just needed to be more open to whoever popped up in my day. I gave more time and attention to everyone I met. I had to. I needed to speak to someone! Waiters, shop assistants, Air BNB hosts, couples sat next to me eating lunch. It turns out when you don’t have any one to talk to and are forced to make conversation with random people you realise everyone has a story, a joke, some local tips. Time to move on….Nothing to worry about here at all.
BEST DISCOVERY:
{A great group of women and a great lover of women}
Women
Women are my greatest discovery of 2018. I know that sounds ridiculous but I have always veered away from large friendship groups of women preferring the company of men. Women had either intimidated me, frustrated me or bored me. The combination of turning 40 {May have mentioned that a few times….} the #metoo movement and the collective roar of women made me open my eyes a bit more. I discovered that we tend to act in certain ways towards each other, around men, as partners because that’s how we’ve been taught. We’ve all {men included} been following the same script for so long and I’m really tired of it. I want to be guided by a new text or perhaps I want to write the story as I go along….
I discovered that once you’ve worked out your power within a room/group of women you can use it to great advantage. Everyone has a power. EVERYONE. It can be a big power like status, fame, money. These powers are obvious to all and sadly often abused. But…your power can also be tiny like humour, kindness, knowledge. These are my favourite powers. These are what have drawn me to the new women I have met and made friendships with this year. These are the powers that have helped me discover the untapped joy and potential of women.
Task for 2019: Work out what your power is. Believe in it and use it for a greater good. It’s so much fun! Trust me…I’m 40. I now know everything.
A selection of inspiring women I have discovered in 2018:
~ Naomi Osaka ~ Rebecca Traitsor ~ Lolly Adefope ~ Akwafina ~ Dr Christine Blasey-Ford ~ Jodie Comer ~ Desiree Akhavan ~ The England National Netball Team ~ Laura Jackson ~
BEST DECISION:
I decided in July of this year not to get a proper job but to concentrate on trying to be a writer. I have been doing bits and bobs here and there but largely living off my savings since I left the jewellery shop and returned from my American road trip. ‘Silly girl’ my friend Marty told me. He’s probably right but what else are your savings for if not pissing them up the wall on a pipe dream, huh? Answer me that Marty? Oh right…a house deposit you say….Well, see the aforementioned change of script!
Foolish or not I’m doing it. I’m trying to be a writer. And by reading this you’re a part of it. Hopefully next year you’ll come and see the play I wrote or you might like and share the sketches I filmed with my friend, Dan {edited by my other friend Dan} and maybe, just maybe next year you’ll read the book I wrote. We’ll see. It doesn’t come without it’s pitfalls though. With this decision I have been lonely at times as well as creatively burnt out. I have an enormous credit card bill and a horrendous back. I have no idea where I’m going but I’m also very happy. I have met new people who have inspired me. I have laughed so much I gave myself stomach ache and I have ideas coming out of me left, right and centre. Besides getting my teeth straightened this might just be my best decision EVER! Watch this space.
Now tell me what your highlights for 2018 have been?
Big or small tell me all….